You may be hearing about the launch of new social networking sites, but Mikebook___+® is not just another social networking site. It’s an entire way of living. Members of Mikebook___+® (we call them awesomefacemonkeys®) know deep inside that they are different from everyone else. They have a special little place inside of their hearts where no poke, DM, tweet, or whatever happens on Myspace can reach. The limited sign-up beta begins tomorrow, but you will need a special invite to participate. Until then, take a look at this table, which compares arbitrary features and demonstrates that Mikebook___+® has more features than any other social networking site in the universe. Check back tomorrow for news on how you can become an awesomefacemonkey®!
Please note: we are still working on some bugs with our yes/no boxes on the table below. You can’t build Rome in a day!
| Mikebook___+® | My______ | Google+ | |||
| Has book in the name |
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| Has ___ in the name | |
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| Has + in the name | |
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| In limited, special beta where only priveleged people can participate | |
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| Is not a $35 million virtual paperweight | |
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| Not used by Ashton Kutcher | |
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| Has blinking ads for things that may or may not exist | |
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| Uses the color blue | |
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| Encourages the inclusion of monkey references | |
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It should be clear that only Mikebook___+® has all of the features you need. You don’t have to take our word for it, check out these testimonials:
“Ever since I became an awesomefacemonkey® and gave all my money to Michael J. Epstein, I have been broke and haven’t been able to eat, but awesomefacemonkey®!!!” – Mick Jagger
“Awesomefacemonkey®? Try Awesomeawesomefacemonkey®!!!” – Kofi Annan
“I always thought social networking was a silly way for me to make a ton of money by saying nonsensical things about issues that I have no right to have an opinion on, but now I know how much social networking can do for you.” – Kim Kardashian